February 2012
When teachers give you an assignment and say:... →
Ellen Degeneres for President.
mjolkk:
oh my god i’m at the grocery store and there is a guy in the frozen section who is tweaked off his balls on some kind hallucinatory drug.
i’m in the next isle meowing softly through the cereal boxes where he can’t see me and he is losing his shit pulling pizza boxes out of the freezers and yelling that he needs to save the popsicle cat
am i a bad person
first discovering a group: omfg how am i going to tell them apart
later in the obsession: omg yes that's him i can tell by his ear shape
Every night:
Me: Oye, I'm so tired I need to go to bed *snuggles into bed*
Body: I'm not comfy
Bed: Here let me add a spring in your side
Body: MAKE ME COMFY
Stomach: I'm hungry
Brain: Hey since you're up, lets contemplate the meaning of life
Me: *about 30 min later, finally comfy*
Brain: Hey remember that time in third grade when you...
Leg: Screw this , I'm going to sleep without you
Ear: WTF was that?!
Brain: It could be a robber, maybe a fire, maybe your mom fell, something broke, probably an emergency, but hey remember when..
Me: *an hour later, comfy again*
Bladder: Not so fast missy.
Teachers: Don't talk to strangers online.
Parents: Don't talk to strangers online.
Everyone: Don't talk to strangers online.
Me: They aren't strangers if we have the same favorite band.